By Siyona Varghese
At six years old, children are entering a crucial stage in emotional development. Their feelings are becoming more complex, their awareness of others is deepening, and they are starting to make connections between what they feel and how they behave. However, they still need consistent guidance to understand and manage these emotional experiences.
Helping six-year-olds build emotional literacy the ability to recognize, name, and regulate emotions is one of the most valuable things we can do for their well-being, relationships, and learning. Here’s how to support them as they navigate this important stage.
Why Naming Emotions Matters
Naming an emotion gives a child power over it. When children can say “I feel frustrated” instead of acting out, they’re already engaging in emotional regulation. This process, sometimes called “name it to tame it,” helps the brain move from reactive to reflective thinking.
At six, children can usually identify basic emotions—like happy, sad, angry, and scared—but are just beginning to recognize more nuanced ones like disappointment, jealousy, embarrassment, or pride. Encouraging a rich emotional vocabulary gives them the tools to better express what they’re going through.
Use Everyday Moments to Teach
The best time to teach emotional understanding isn’t during a meltdown—it’s in the quiet, ordinary moments of daily life. Use books, cartoons, or shared experiences to ask questions like:
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“How do you think she felt when that happened?”
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“What do you feel when you miss someone?”
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“Have you ever felt nervous like that before?”
This helps children learn that emotions are normal, temporary, and shared by others. It also builds empathy and perspective-taking.
Create a Feelings Vocabulary
Use tools like emotion charts, cards, or a “feelings thermometer” to help children label what they’re feeling with more accuracy. Instead of just “mad,” help them identify if they’re annoyed, frustrated, or furious. Instead of just “sad,” could it be lonely, disappointed, or hurt?
You can also create a “Feelings Corner” or emotion wheel at home or in class to make emotional language more visible and accessible.
Teach Coping Tools, Not Just Rules
Once emotions are named and validated, it’s time to equip children with strategies for managing them. For a six-year-old, these can include:
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Deep breathing (“Smell the flower, blow out the candle”)
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Drawing or writing about their feelings
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Taking a break in a quiet space
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Using words to ask for what they need
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Talking to a trusted adult
Practice these tools when the child is calm so they’re easier to access when upset.
Model It Yourself
Children learn how to manage emotions by watching how adults handle theirs. If you’re feeling frustrated, say something like: “I’m feeling overwhelmed right now, so I’m going to take a deep breath and come back to this.”
This models self-regulation, emotional awareness, and healthy responses all essential for children to internalize.
Expect Setbacks and Celebrate Growth
Emotional learning is not linear. Some days your child may surprise you with how well they express their feelings; other days may feel like starting from scratch. That’s normal. What matters most is consistency, empathy, and connection.
Celebrate small wins, like using words instead of yelling or identifying their feeling without prompting. These moments build confidence and reinforce emotional growth.
Final Thoughts
Helping a six-year-old name and navigate their emotions isn’t about avoiding negative feelings it’s about giving them the skills to understand and respond to them in healthy ways. As adults, our role is to be calm guides, curious listeners, and consistent teachers of emotional life.
In doing so, we’re not just helping them get through a bad day we’re building the foundation for lifelong mental and emotional resilience.
References
- https://www.apa.org/topics/parenting/emotion-regulation
- http://kidshelpline.com.au/parents/issues/helping-kids-identify-and-express-feelings
